The Six Types of Elf Mum

Ok, there’s a divide on the Internet at the moment. Those who ‘Elf’ and those who don’t.

I’m not about to put my case forward on why we are an EOTS family (3 years and counting), and I’m also not going to diss those who don’t invite these odd little creatures into their home at advent (yes, ok, it is a bit creepy) But, what some people may not know, is that elfing itself is heavily divided.

When these crazy creatures fill your newsfeed it’s easy to group us all together and I do feel a bit defensive when people talk about elf messes and passive aggressively state that they don’t have ‘time to elf’ (as though I’m some lady of leisure with nothing better to do than think in elf 24/7) but I do see how misconceptions can form.

Every family is different and I don’t want to persuade you that EOTS is a must for Xmas (it’s really not) but rather educate non elfers on those who give us a bad name as well as alternative traditions should you choose.

If you thought breast vs bottle was the biggest mum divide then you never read an elfmum post on social media… They’re a killer, so grab some popcorn and enjoy this (slightly tongue in cheek) run-down on the different sub groups…..

The Perfectly crafted elf

These are the Pinterest perfect mums who have a beautiful home made set up for elfie every night. The ones who seem to get the negative press for having too much time on their hands. Slightly intimidating to other elfers they are the queen bees of advent.

Most likely antic: Winter wonderland (we’re talking the whole living room transformed)

Negatives: Time consuming

Positives: You’re bound to rack up some Pinterest pomits


The Gift elf:

It’s traditional for elves to bring an Xmas eve box of goodies on their final visit but gift elf mums take this further, every day the elf in question brings the children of the house a new toy or gift Ugrah

Most likely antic: Here’s a treat

Negatives: Overall cost and spoilt children

Positives: Keeps em quiet for a bit


The Disciplin elf 

Possibly the most contentious of the 6, the discipline elf mum takes the ‘Watching for Santa’ to the extreme, rather than setting healthy boundaries with the kids the elf is the ultimate form of passive aggressive parenting.

Most likely antic: On strike, not returning until your behaviour improves

Negative: Kids form a rather shaky attachment to their elf, these are the ones who find it hard to say goodbye

Positive: You don’t have to think of something every night


The Kindness elf

With little tasks each day designed to make the world a better place. Kindness elves are a sub group in their own right, designed to build self esteem and encourage selfless acts, they leave notes and suggestions for helping others.

Most likely antic: Why not donate some toys to the children’s hospice

Negatives: Only negative when posted over social media (giving isn’t giving if it’s for self gratification on how lovely a person you are)

Positives: Children learn the importance of thinking of others at Christmas


The Naughty elf:

Because children really need encouraging further, this elf makes a mess, leave rude notes and an awful lot of destruction in its wake

Most likely antic: Shaving daddy’s head

Negatives: Oh the contradiction

Positives: Quick and easy the night before


The Imagination elf

Who needs props and treats when you have a toy chest of ideas. From playing football with the teddies and reading bedtime stories… cleaning their teeth and doing baking, imagination elf mums create mini set ups from existing household items.

Most likely antic: The shoe train

Negatives: You’ve got to have a whole lot of imagination

Positives: Less focus on behaviour


The Reluctant elf

Three years ago you began elf on the shelf, It was such fun thinking of new ideas, now you’ve run out of steam…but you know you’ve gotta keep up the magic…..year on bloomin year.

Most likely antic: Forgot to move the sodding thing so he’s quickly shoved in a glass jar while the kids are searching for him

Negatives: You’re too ashamed to share your haphazard attempt on social media

Positives: The kids don’t bloody care, whatever elfie does is magical


So now you know…. The divide is very real…. Don’t even get me started on the touch vs no touch rule….

4 Responses to “The Six Types of Elf Mum”

  1. We’re not an elf family. I’ve seen the adult versions (not for kids eyes) which I thought were hilarious but it’s their faces that do it for me. There will be a horror film at some point where the elves torture and dismember a misfortunate family at Christmas time, leaving them all in elf like scenes with spilt cheerio’s and bloody footprints……ok mind going in to overdrive now lol

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